7.5.01
so i’m in a log cabin in the woods with my lean mean computing machine, trying to be a web designer with a really glorious telecommute. trouble is, the selection of ISPs out here is pretty thin. oh DSL, how i miss you so! in order to truly express my agony, i’ve composed my own alanis morissette song about my online woes (courtesy of brunching shuttlecock’s alanis lyrics generator):
“Will to Live”
I feel miserable
Phone calls make me ill
I feel miserable
Billing-by-the-minute tears at my foundations
I feel miserable
No carrier tones are dragging me down to the depths of misery
I want to die
Is it because of The Bad ISP that I feel this way?
With the green rays of misery pounding on my brain?
Or am I lost in tale of Dylan, adrift far from home
I don’t think so, I don’t think so.
Earthlink Broke My Will to Live
Earthlink Broke My Will to Live
Earthlink Broke My Will to Live
I was getting better but then
Earthlink Broke My Will to Live
I feel miserable
Tech support rots the flesh from my bones
I feel miserable
14.4 Kbps defeats my purpose
I feel miserable
These suckers are doing their best to impale my soul
I want to die
Is it because of The Bad ISP that I feel this way?
With the green rays of misery pounding on my brain?
Am I lost in tale of Dylan, adrift far from home
I don’t think so, I don’t think so.
Earthlink Broke My Will to Live
Earthlink Broke My Will to Live
Oh God, earthlink Broke My Will to Live
I was getting better but then
Earthlink Broke My Will to Live
oh, but it gets better: my new song, now run through babelfish’s english-japanese-english translator (because i’m just not tired of that toy yet):
” ” The miserable telephone which has lived it calls and in me the miserable computer miserable bill the misery where where I would like to die it pulls with my fundamental thing where I feel that I am pulled to depth and in order to tear, I where in order if to do thing, I feel the sickness which I feel like this do, as for thing that you feel because of the bad ISPs difference? misery of my brain the green light ray of pounding. or I me so lost with the story of the Dylan from the house which is not thought, wandering, directly, me so you do not think, it is. To the Earthlink which has lived me where I who in order to live me broke will broke will will you obtained the Earthlink well than me to the Earthlink which has lived, you broke, but, Then as for the Earthlink if my bone thing where in order my purpose where I feel that the impale miserable suction cup is best and has done to be defeated thing I feel my mind where miserable technical support meat miserable email I who broke my will in order to live would like to die because of the empty it becomes corrupted as for me I who am felt like this do, as for thing that you feel because of the bad ISPs difference? misery of my brain the green light ray of pounding. I me so lost with the story of the Dylan from the house which is not thought, wandering, directly, Me so you do not think, it is. To God namely the earthlink of Ohio state which has lived me where I who in order to live me broke will broke will will you obtained the Earthlink well than me to the Earthlink which has lived, you broke, but, then the Earthlink broke my will in order to live.
the important sentiments to pull from that, I believe, are:
“Earthlink broke my will in order to live”
“I feel that the pale miserable suction cup is best and has to be done”
“where would I like to die? it pulls my fundamental thing; I feel that I am pulled to depth and order tears”
“miserable technical support meat”
“aye me! so lost in the house which is not thought, wandering”
“to God: the earthlink of Ohio state”
yeah, i think that just about sums up my day. oh, and i had fried prawns for dinner at a resturant called Lardo’s. they were too greasy.