10.14.02 – charleston, WV, lexington , KY

there is NOTHING TO DO when you are sans motor vehicle and living in a motel on the outskirts of lexington, KY for the weekend. yes, given that most of my complaints are about lack of free time to myself, i won’t fail to entertain myself with internet access and a big thick russian novel for the rest of the day. but if i had a car my roommate majorie and i would be going horseback riding on a kentucky horse farm, so i’m kinda bummed about that. i’m not wild about the south (this california convert misses avocados on sale 4/$1, dry desert air and the ocean, and the juxtaposition of baptist churches and strip clubs here rankle my inner feminist), but fortunately tomorrow we’re headed back across the mason-dixon line to indiana, and then illinois and michigan.

i saw white oleander last night. it moves a bit too slow to please the average action-flick buff, but since watching movies is mostly a visual experience for me, i just require them to be eye-candy – as long as the plot and dialogue are not so awful as to be distracting, and i get to look at pretty people, costumes, and scenery, i’m happy.

mm. need a cafe nearby. the sort with squishy couches and non-fluorescent lighting and excellent espresso where i can settle down at a table amongst other bookish sorts and read my book all afternoon. since the best i can do is waffle house (did i mention that i hate the south?), and i already spent two hours there this morning with a book and bad coffee, i’m stuck in my hotel room for the afternoon. at least i have the internet to keep me company.

10.10.02 – charlottesville, VA

callie and duane were married on september 14, 2002, in troy, idaho.

10.9.02 – fairfield CT, lancaster PA, hagerstown, MD

hagerstown is the middle of nowhere. between the fact that i left my computer’s power cable in yesterday’s hotel, and that my phone is on analog roam, i feel truly cut off from the world. i’m borrowing time from my roomate’s computer now, but this could be my last post for a few days until i figure out how to track down a new AC adapter. answering email could be a bit (more) sporadic as well.

pennsylvania…

…smells funny. the water in the hotel shower smelled like lawn clippings, of all things.

…on route 222, you actually have to drive from virginville to escstacy via intercourse. i’m not making this up.

…road sign on the interstate:

the land of make-believe
next right

…last night, while parking the van, a man in a sedan pulled up by us and motioned for us to roll down window. “is this the host?” he asked us in a monotone. he had that pale,spaced out look of someone in, say, attack of the body-snatchers or something. “umm, this is the ramada,” said adam, gesturing toward the hotel. “do you know where the host is?” the guy repeated. “umm, no, sorry,” we said, and he drove away. adam turned to me. “did that just happen? okay aliens really are taking over lancaster.” i thought there was something strange about that town other than the smell. i decided not to drink the funny-smelling water.

10.6.02 – boston, MA

valerie and grant are getting married!! yay! it’s about time, i say. it’s reassuring to know that fairy tale romances sometimes do work out.

wedding fever is in the air. the same day i got val’s announcement, i got a similar message from an ex-boyfriend – you know the first love, the one that knocks you off your feet and makes you think that you two alone have invented being in love? yeah. he was that one. i was ready to (and very nearly did) follow him to the end of the earth. when he dumped me i felt like i couldn’t breathe for weeks. anyway, that was a long time ago, and when i got the email i say very still for a moment waiting to see if the old wounds were going to sting. not much happened. “well, then, good luck to her,” i thought. “she’s going to need it.”

i also had the immense privilege and joy of being the maid of honor at callie’s wedding a few weeks ago – wedding pictures are forthcoming when i get like two seconds of free time to myself on this tour, which might be a while from now, we’ll see.

10.5.02 – boston, MA

weird body trick of the day:

if i press my shoulder blades together, the muscles make the shape of a butterfly. cool.

the upside to all the hard work on this tour is that after five weeks i’m already noticably stronger. last spring, in an argument over hotel room beds, i challenged my brothers to an arm wrestling contest, and they both beat me. after this tour, however, i’m looking forward to a rematch at christmas.

10.4.02 – manchester NH, tarrytown NY, wilkes-barre PA, bethel CT

Who needs sleep? Well you’re never gonna get it

Who needs sleep? Tell me what’s that for

Who needs sleep? Be happy with what you’re getting

There’s a guy who’s been awake since the second world war

&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp – the barenaked ladies

i found vermont to be most agreeable. it’s full of hippies and recycling and vegetarian food: a little piece of california plopped down amid rolling hills of dense green forests. after vermont was a show in new hampshire, one in upstate new york, one in pennselvania, an overnight stop in connecticut and back to boston for a (much too) brief day off. i don’t get to see much of these towns, spending less than 24 hours in each one, but there is time between the motel rooms and peformances and not-quite-enough-sleep to absorb something of the pulse in the people i meet – theatre crews, the hotel clerks and cashiers and waitresses. all those elton-john-esque songs about how hard life is on the road have new sort of resonance now. there’s a meloncholy lurking in each new anynomous hotel room, in the sense of rootlessness, in the distance ringing loud in the long-distance phone calls. chain stores provide a sense of familiarity and comfort – giant neon becons for target, home depot, starbucks, holiday inn looming above the interstate on dark, wet nights.

9.30.02 – burlington, VT

first night out on tour. by happy coincidence, my last night in boston was also the night that Vienna Teng was playing at the wonderfully-funky tiny House of Blues in harvard square. if you haven’t already discovered her, check her out. vienna played with two other women who also have forthcoming debut albums on virt records: Rachel Gaudry and Beth Boucher, both of whom really kick butt.

as i was watching the show, it struck me how stunningly beautiful people are when they are doing something that they love. all three of these women were completely transformed, shimming with some sort of inner light and joy that radiated out into and touched the audience in individual ways. it was awe-inspiring. i know i’ve quoted this before, but here it is again:

people used to make records

as in a record of an event

the event of people playing music in a room

now everything is cross-marketing

its about sunglasses & shoes

or guns & drugs

you choose

-ani difranco

live music, like theatre, is a unique art form because it exists within the moment that audience and performer share. as perfect as a perfect recording of a performance is, it can’t hold a candle to a perfect, live moment. it lives on as a part of audience and performer; we take it into ourselves, we transform it by our own perceptions, our eyes and ears and feelings and the baggage that we bring with us so that no one experiences the same show, and afterwards, when the lights go down, we can say, i was there. i was in that moment. it lives in me.

9.18.02 – little signs

blog entries are piling up in my notebook, as i have much time to write on the bus stop but very little time at the computer. actually, i just have very little free time right now – working lots getting this tour ready to go on the road. or, rather, working lots to get me ready to go on the road with the tour. since this tour has gone out like 10 years in a row before this, it’s like a monster that has its own life and i’m just trying to learn how to hang on.

monday was my low day – there’s always one, the moment when you just want to quit and go home, or at least just sit down and cry from sheer exhaustion and feeling lonely in a strange city and overwhelmed by all the work there is to do. the lows are low in this game, but the highs are high, so it all balances out in my favor in the end. anyway, i got home on a very rainy dark night on monday, and was reading the paper while eating my dinner of re-heated rice-a-roni when my eye fell on this:

If a man loves the labour of his trade, apart from any question of success or fame, the gods have called him.

-Robert Louis Stevenson

i took it as a sign from the gods that i really am in the right business, even if the lows are low – a reminder that i do love the labor of my trade, even if i don’t love all the details.

9.11.02

let there be peace on our earth and in our hearts.

9.8.02 – the little things

there are few simples pleasures in life as nice as bare feet. particularly when i’m in a big city and am required to wear shoes and do lots of walking on hard surfaces – concrete sidewalks, metal stairs and the like – the very first thing i do, upon arriving home, is tear off my shoes, followed by the socks, and wiggle my toes free. i walk around the house enjoying the different surfaces – cool concrete in the cellar, hard wood in the living room, carpet in my bedroom, cool grass in the front yard. if i could, i’d spend my life barefoot. summers in idaho, i often go months without wearing anything more than flipflops, which is essentially like treating my feet to walking barefoot on a rubber surface all day, with room for my toes to breathe and stretch and wiggle. not surprisingly, i don’t believe in impractical shoes – the impossibly pointy sort which mash and mangle the toes, or the heels so high that they bend the spine and ruin one’s posture. this isn’t to say that i haven’t occasionally been seduced by the prospect of a sexy stiletto, but in the end these shoes live in the back of my closet, and i wear my sneakers until the soles are worn thru.

and now you all know about my feet. they don’t stink, much.