5.8.02 – the anatomy of the Un-Boy

found out yesterday that an ex is getting married. and no matter how much i know that i’m better off without him, it doesn’t change the fact that something made it hard for me to breathe last night. the feeling passed in the face of logic, but even still. i feel like a set of romantic training wheels.

which brings me to another, more serious issue: there appears to be a significant decline in the number of Un-Boys in the world. whatever happened to them? i mean, they were always a rare commodity, but these days they seem downright scarce. recent field research has led me to the disturbing conclusion that perhaps Un-Boys grow up to be regular guys after all. maybe Un-Boy-ness isn’t a personality trait so much as it is a stop along the way from adolescence to adulthood, before the inevitable broken hearts of our twenties crush their heart-on-the-sleeve idealism and leave them jaded and behaving much like their beer-swilling counterparts. maybe Un-Boys don’t survive past age 21 and now there just aren’t many left, or perhaps i’ve just used up all my Un-Boy karma. maybe i’ve contributed to the decline – god knows, hearts were broken on all sides.